HOW BLESSED ARE WE!

well, once again we had a wonderful sunday dinner. what made it so wonderful? family!

as some of you know, last week we found out that my longtime friend and coworker was found dead in his home. this was very sad news for me. sid and i had known each other for alsmost 24 years. he was a wonderful man who loved life and family. the sad thing was that when he was discovered, the coranor said that he had been gone for at least 3 weeks, maybe longer. this made me even sadder, to know that no one knew that he was not ok, that he died alone.

he had 2 sons, but they had not talked for a while. he put one of them through college and they had an argument about money his senior year. sid finished paying for his college and never got to see him graduate. he also never got to see him get married or have his first and second child. at his sister's funeral, he got to see his first grandchild for a couple of hours. he talked to his son, and thought that maybe they could start all over again, however, sid wanted an apology that never came. the son never contacted him after that day. i don't think that he knew that sid was still waiting for an apology. his son just never made an effort to try to continue to keep in touch with him. it had been many years since they had not talked and maybe he had become used to it and never made the time. i really don't know what it was, but i knew that sid was very sad not to be a part of his life. we talked about it many times, sometimes on a daily basis. i would tell him about my own experience with my sister, and would tell him that life was very fragile and too short to go on like that. he would nod, and say "evy, i know you are right, but i sacrified everything for those boys, and i do not deserve to be treated like this." i would nod and agree that he did not deserve to be treated that way, but told him that i hoped that they would overcome that silence some day.

i've spoken to sid's exwife and we have talked about the sons. they are in alot of pain over the death of their father. they never got to say they were sorry or that they loved him because they let something or other get in the way. life is too short to let things come in between your relationships with your family and loved ones. if we have been admonished to love our enemies, we can certainly love our family and friends and forgive whatever they might have done to cause us pain. i regret not being closer to sid. i too let him down. i never kept track of him once he retired last year in march. we had lunch once and talked on the phone 3 or 4 times. i knew his health was not good. i kept on him about it. he had high blood preassure and diabetes. he would eat the wrong things and not exercise. he promised he would, once we he retired, but old habits are hard to change. sid loved our family and we loved him. i know that he is in a better place, but i'm sad he was not able to fulfill his dream to move to kauia and sink his toes in the sand and watch the sunset each night from the beach.

i've known for a long time that we never know when our turn on earth will be over, so i have tried to live my life as full as i can. i try not to put things off for when i retire. i am trying to do as much as i can now. i love my family and want to spend as much time as i can with them, and do as much as i can for them. the only thing that we can take with us are our memories and the knowledge that we have acquired on this earth. i know that sid's death has taught alot of people the fragility of life, and hope that they will learn to love and embrace each day, their families and their love ones too. may i never loose sight of what is truly important. i have been truly blessed. i love you all!